This should be an easy task either you do or you don't trust someone or something. Yet,it is such a hard task for me or many to do. Once that band of trust is broken it can be broken forever or take some time to regain it back. So where do you go for all knowing answers well of course the "INTERNET". E-How in particular
•1 Make a list of the reasons that you do not trust the other person. View the list objectively and determine if the reasons are speculation or if the issues that caused you to lose trust were supported by facts.
•2 Assess the severity of the trust issues and the effect that the loss of trust has had on the relationship. Consider if there have been other times when this person has caused you to lose trust. Decide if the situation warrants forgiving the offender and working towards regaining trust.
•3 Talk to the person that has lost your trust. Let him know why. Explain to him what you need from him to be able to regain trust in him again.
•4 Accept an apology if that is all you feel the need for from the person to be able to forgive her. In some cases an apology is not what it is needed. You may need to ask the person to come up with a solution that prevents a repeat of the trust breaking in the future. You might also feel the need to ask for promises of future behavior, even though at the moment you feel you can not trust the promises.
•5 Explain to the person you are trying to regain trust in to expect it to take time for you to be able to trust him again.
•6 Forgive her for breaking your trust and causing you pain. After telling the person they are forgiven, reflect it in your actions. Treat him as you would treat someone who has not broken your trust. This is hard to do at first, but show the forgiveness outwardly in your dealings with him and eventually you begin to feel the forgiveness in your heart. This does not mean you forget the hurt, you just forgive it.
•7 Allow yourself time to heal from the pain. If the person does not break your trust again, as time passes your comfort level with trusting her increases. If however, you regain trust and then it is shattered again, the ability to regain trust in her gets more difficult each time.
http://www.ehow.com/how_2259250_regain-trust-someone.html
Reading through this list I have noticed they are referring to "HER". You know a man is not coming to EHOW. com to read about how to forgive his girlfriend because that would mean men have deep rooted sensitive feelings and generally give a crap! lol.. (The answer is Yes, if you're asking your self "Wow, she's a little bitter") Aren't we all???
As I have watched and listened to my friends over this past year I have started wondering
if anyone within our society these days really cares anymore about life, people, trust, values, and commitment? It seems the stars and heavens are not aligned lately or could it be us as humans not being aligned?
To have trust you must have forgiveness as well. A willingness to forgive that pain. Something I have learned lately is that you can forgive without forgetting. I have known this before but never really felt the meaning of it until I watched the Show "Amish Grace", it is a movie based off the novel "Amish Grace" a telling story recounting the details of the days in Pennsylvania and the shooting and murder that took place in the Amish school house. Watching the Amish forgive is amazing ;something we should all strive to have in our hearts daily. Well without the drab dresses and pooping horse and buggies.
"Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven, who sins are covered. Blessed is the man whose sin the Lord doesn't count against him and in whose spirit is no deceit" (Psalm 32:1-2).
If I sit and think about it I am always asking for God and others to forgive me for my stupid mistakes and my word vomit that seems to always slip out of my mouth before I know it; then why shouldn't I continually forgive others. Living a life with a wall is a sheltered life and no life at all. Yet, if you or I have a person in our lives that continue down the same path they have asked for forgiveness for and you always find yourself miserable and depressed it's time to take charge, get that negativity out of your life. Living a healthy stable life with goodness and greatness is a must. Take Charge It's Our Lives!!
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